May 2024 Newsletter

How To Be A Better Communicator

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Listening with intent is the secret tool for effective communication.

To bring opportunities and better conditions into your life being a better communicator is a skill worth mastering, not just in a professional capacity, but in every facet of life.

Communication is not only about speaking; it encompasses understanding, absorbing, and effectively reacting to what the other person is saying.

Simply put, being an excellent communicator starts with being an outstanding listener.

Whether you are an aspiring entrepreneur or attempting to move forward in your job, the art of active listening brings an inexplicably powerful presence to any conversation.

The dynamics of conversation simply involve a speaker and a listener.

Take notice the next time you are watching a TV interview observe how the best interviewers are brilliant listeners.

So, next time you are part of a group or a one-on-one discussion, don't just focus on what you have to say, pay attention to what others are saying. This is the power.

When you really, really listen, you demonstrate you value their input.

If authentic, attentive listening doesn't come naturally to you, don't worry.

It can be taught. Practice the process until it becomes second nature to your communication style.

You will stand alone as a great communicator because sadly, the majority tend to be part-time listeners.

Be aware, our brain often tricks us into believing we are listening when we are not.

Do not fall into the trap of hearing the first few words or sentences, forming a judgment, and responding prematurely. This is the primary reason for misunderstanding the whole verbal transaction.

By changing your listening skills and genuinely focusing on what the other person is saying, you will avoid unnecessary communication faults and show respect towards the speaker.

An interesting context for understanding our listening habits would be a social gathering.

Typically, everyone has experienced being part of a group where one or two individuals dominate the conversation.

Take your mind back to such scenarios. Were you genuinely interested in the discussion, or were you waiting for your opportunity to chime in? More often than not, we tend to forget the context of such conversations just because we are not truly listening.

Practice this one thing.

Listen with intent.

In your next conversation, speak only when you are asked to comment.

This is powerful.

Get this right and you are in the game.

When asked a question, politely repeat it back. This will prompt the speaker to elaborate.

The speaker will be obligated almost commanded to deliver the question in another form. Do not jump in. Even if you know the answer or completely understand the question. Do not show your hand, yet.

Pause!!!!

Remember the best TV interviewers?

The power of the pause and subtle controlled eye contact can make you a brilliant communicator.

This simple process will change everything.

Skilful listening gives you an unexpected authority in a conversation.

When you’re in a one-on-one, conversation, encourage the other person to speak as much as possible.

This is the kicker.

Control the direction of the conversation with relevant questions and actively listen to the speaker's responses.

Pay attention to physical cues.

Notice posture such as leaning forward, making eye contact, and giving the speaker adequate time to articulate their thoughts.

After their response, let that powerful moment of pause sink in before moving forward.

Control this by breathing to relax and stay calm.

When you’re at a social gathering, approach each conversation the same - with genuine interest and focused listening.

Making Small Talk

Treat every conversation as an opportunity for discovery and connection. Be interested in the person. A beautiful statement is, to ask a question like, “That is very interesting, tell me more”, or “I find that so interesting, How did you get started in that role?”

The journey from small talk to meaningful conversation requires you to try these strategies. The more you do it the better you get.

Know that everyone loves a great listener. When people like to talk about themselves, encourage it.

They’re not interested in you, yet.

Successful paraphrasing and controlling the conversation to where you want it to go can dramatically make you a better communicator.

The journey from small talk to meaningful conversation requires you to try these strategies. The more you do it the better you get.

Know that everyone loves a great listener. When people like to talk about themselves, encourage it.

They’re not interested in you, yet.

Successful paraphrasing and controlling the conversation to where you want it to go can dramatically make you a better communicator.

As you improve, you will find that people will gravitate towards you because they know you will genuinely listen.

This doesn't just make you a better communicator, it also makes you a better leader, colleague and friend.

Learning how to listen can be taught and quantified, but the most important part is to continue practising.

Being a great listener helps solidify your status as a master communicator.

Getting a mentor can teach you the process and guide you to becoming a better communicator.

The thing to understand is when you are listening and focusing with genuine interest to someone, they feel valued.

You become a friend, colleague, confidant and a much better communicator.

Until next time, keep the conversation flowing.